GANEIDA'S KNOT.

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Quaker by conviction, mother by default, Celticst through love, Christ follower because I once was lost but now am found...

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Sons

A boy is the only thing that God can use to make a man.-- Author Unknown

Somewhere down the years they grew big. They think they're men. [I won't dissuade them just yet.]. Somewhere along the way they grew too big for my lap, too big for cuddles, too brave to be afraid.

Sssh. Don't tell. Sons wring mother's hearts more than daughters. Mother's have to be brave with sons so that their sons grow courageous. See I wanted to keep them safe, snugly tucked under my heart; they wanted to fly like hawks, wild & free. I loosed the jesses.

When they wanted a boat I taught them to row & pretended not to see how precariously their cockleshell rocked upon the sea. When they wanted to camp I bought them a tent, showed them how to pitch it & set up a camp that wouldn't blow away in the night. When we had snakes in the chook pen I handed the sugar bag & the rake to my sons though I know perfectly well how to catch a carpet snake & put it somewhere else.

I pretended not to worry when they all climbed in the old rattle trap on the farm & went careering through the orchard until the petrol ran out. There is a reason men were not allowed to serve in the temple until after they'd turned 25. Young men have no fear, no sense of mortality. They need to know they can walk the edge & survive. I bit my tongue & held my silence when they went sky diving, scurfed behind trawlers in white shark country, rolled themselves up in their surf board bags & slept on beaches.

'We'll be fine, mum! Don't worry.'

Pardon? I'm their mother. Of course I worry.

Parenting sons is not for wooses. And perish the thought it gets any better. My mother has sons. One flew for a living; low level flying. It doesn't get much more dangerous than that & one day his plane plowed into the ground. Her other son lives aboard a 50' cat & is careering round the Pacific with his wife & kids. He's been doing it for a while but you'd better believe she worries. Doesn't say anything. Life's for living, remember? Each phone call is a reminder that all's still well, they haven't been boarded by pirates, sunk beneath the waves without a trace or all gone mad & abanded ship like those strangely abandoned boats of the Bermuda Triangle.

I'm starting to see signs that my sons are settling down. The strange between times of growing from boys into men is almost done. We have all survived by God's grace & cautiously, dare I hope, they've turned out OK after all. *breathes sigh of relief*

{Well, what did you think I'd say? That they are wonderful & terrific, which they are, & they're mine & you can't have them? ;P}



8 comments:

A. said...

I think you need to come to the States and lecture on this...we have lots of males but so few men.

Allison

seekingmyLord said...

I really wanted a boy, as boys are so rare in my family and my husband's as well, but obviously God knows my limits better than I do. I have just one girl, who fearlessly plays rough and tough like a boy and dresses up priss and prim for dinner like a young lady of royalty just because she wants to--I did tell you that live a life of contradictions, didn't I?

Anymore of that English toffee ice cream left?

Ganeida said...

Seeking: I'm so sorry; I ate all the icecream...& I hate to disallusion you but the roughest, toughest, tumblingst girl still isn't anything like a boy. I know. I was one of those & I have one of those. A girl has a much better developed sense of self preservation. lol

Allison: I should love to come lecture but what's wrong with your males?

Diane Shiffer said...

ooh girl, i needed top read this. parenting my son is the one thing in life that has brought me to my knees with the most regularity. being a single mom makes it more difficult. i know boys need men to help them become a man, but what's a girl to do? trust in God, i guess♥


ice cream? ice cream? did somebody mention ice cream?

Constance said...

As you know this is a subject near and very dear to my heart! I only have 1 son, Charles and I have 3 older daughters. There is no way to describe the connection between a mother and a son. Our daughter Jennifer who is pregnant with her 1st boy is naturally excited after having 2 girls. I told her that obviously you love your girls but having a boy is like opening up a previously unknown and undiscovered chamber of your heart! It IS a special bond and I am indeed blessed!

It's funny this topic has come up because my Hub is currently reading a book, entitled
"Wild At Heart" Discovering The Secrets Of A Man's Soul by John Eldredge. He shared a tidbit with me the other night. He said that society has "tamed" men, demasculinized them, expecting them to be a certain way but at their essence, God created men to be wild at heart, they need an adventure. When he's done I plan to read it as well.

The women's movement while in some awareness aspects has been a good thing, in a lot of ways it has devalued the basic differences of the way God created men and women.

Once I read the book, I'll do a review.

have a lovely weekend my friend!
Connie

Britwife said...

I am the biggest worrier (about everything). I try to let them do their "things" but sometimes it's so hard to hold my tongue.

Sandra said...

I am the mother of one child, a son. He is 35 and he was never adventurous. Still is a most cautious individual. I wonder sometimes who raised him?

Becky K. said...

This post is so absolutely packed with truth. I have the hardest time letting my middle daredevil son do all of the terrible tricks he so loves to do. His fascination with speed and racing keep my heart pitter pattering many days.

However, I know that he is a gift from God, placed in our family for a reason...and that God will care for Mikey in the best way possible.

Thanks for the reminders!